Of course Simon Cowell has forged a very successful career in ad-libbing scathing assessments of peoples’ talent (or lack of), helped in no small way by his creation of X Factor. The real talent on show here is the ability to earn millions off the back of deluded individuals who, while singing in the shower, believe they are the next Madonna with such conviction that they become apoplectic when told otherwise. This is the real entertainment on show; would-be superstars up on stage, in front of millions on television, warbling like a drowning cat. The comical reactions of their doused aspirations often raises a chuckle, but that’s where it ends as far as I’m concerned. You see, in case you didn’t notice, I like to berate things and I like to pick up on the negative (although I see it as more of a skill than a disposition). So when all the misled wannabes are weeded out I see little entertainment. I don’t want to see a bunch of nobodies doing karaoke impressions of Spice Girls songs that were dire even in their original format.
Having said that, I do find it amusing that people have tried to sue for ‘hurt feelings’. Seriously, do they not watch the show before signing up? If your other half invited you to appear on Jerry Springer your first thought should not be “Wow, I’ll be on TV”, it should be “Who are you sleeping with behind my back?” It reminds me of the idiots who sued McDonald’s for burning themselves on coffee. These people should not be allowed to interact with others. Or breed.
Britain’s Got Talent extends the format, I guess, so you can watch people equally bereft of aptitude for anything useful juggling blow torches and doing moonwalks across the stage. I mean, where do these people think it will lead? Being able to spin a glass on your forehead while playing a trumpet might be funny at a party but it’s not much of a career is it? Take that show on the road and you’ll run out of material pretty quickly.
There are many of these Talent franchises around the world, including one in Lithuania (Lietuvos Talentai, if you’re interested), a country which has a population of three million people. Sure, you really ought to be able to find some talented people in there but it’s a bit like Birmingham’s Got Talent. I can imagine after two series the winner will be someone who can eat twelve eggs in ten seconds.
I don’t deliberately watch any of it, but it's occasionally on in the house which means I can't completely avoid it. Clearly, if you have Cheryl Cole and Danni Minogue onboard then it's going to be more tolerable but I still only see it when passing through a room where it's playing. As with many other TV shows it’s hard to avoid in the rest of your life. Women (generally) will want to discuss that “lovely tubby girl from Newcastle with the beautiful voice” for an hour in the office with their friends the next day and don’t dare log into any social networking website the night it’s on TV.
The bombardment of status updates from people outraged that their favourite star-to-be was dumped from the show is suffocating. I suspect, on one particular night after a deluge of them, I didn’t win any extra friends by posting something akin to “Has there been a major international crisis, or did some C-list celebrity just make a decision about a person no-one's ever heard of which, in turn, has absolutely zero relevance on anything important in the real world?”
Oh well, c’est la vie.
